what will this be about?

So... I've been meaning to blog about quite a few things lately. The problem is, I've been too lazy to actually type any of them out. So on my way home from work today I starting writing this blog (in my brain)... except I kept going off on all these tangents. So now that I've forced myself to sit down and type, we'll see which story actually comes out.
About a week or so ago something happened. It was not anything big, but it created big waves in myself. Vague enough? Suffice it to say that I starting thinking about some things and resolved to stop thinking and start doing. Now, let me just point out that I am on a journey of sorts. It's a journey to a better me. One thing I realized early on was that I could only focus on one or two things at a time because there are wayyyyyyyy too many things I want to "fix" about myself to try to do it all at once.
So, back to my butterfly effect. I have resolved to really focus on two very important things:

1. Shut my mouth. Now, I will only admit this here, but I tend to be a bit of a gossip. Hear me out. I'm not THAT person, and it has taken me a very long time to realize (and admit) that what I do is actually gossip. I like to talk, and sometimes the content of my conversations is people. Innocent enough, right? Well.... no. End of story. Jesus wouldn't be happy being a part of some of my conversations.

2. Open my eyes. Weird, huh? Partially, this is literal. I need to open my eyes sometimes becuase I'm a total klutz. Maybe if I was looking where I was going.... I digress. My goal is to stop being so critical... to open my eyes to see people the way that Jesus would see them. Not as my annoying neighbor, but as the daughter that is hurting and alone, who desperately needs someone to keep her company and perhaps be the vehicle in which God can reach her.

So those have been my goals. After a wonderful end to the weekend (which, I feel is the most important part of the weekend - I'll expand more on that in another blog), it was Monday morning and I was ready to get back to work and keep working on those (because, as it stands, work is where I need the most improvement in those 2 areas).
The day began wonderfully and continued well - the sun was shinning, the kids were great, we gardened and played and sang and just had a great time. And then it happened. I'm not going to go into detail... but I did feel much discontent towards a particular person. Jesus didn't like how I felt...but, I have to say that it didn't last long! I dealt with it and moved on rather quickly. Yay me! Perhaps there is hope yet.
But then... (yes, there's a "but then") Tuesday morning I got to work and a few of us began simply discussing the previous days events. Aw crap, I'm such a liar. We gossiped about it.
I'm sorry Coworkerwhowillremainnameless.
I'm sorry Jesus.
I'm sorry WonderfulJessicawhoishidingsomewhereinsidemetryingtogetout.
I will do better. I promise.
I will also screw up. Please bear with me.